Not Used This In A While...

J? James? Come on man… you gotta talk to me! Please? Ok so we both did something and I think you might not regret it as much as you made out but you can’t just erase me from your life! We’re best mates and we work together… James? Please? Talk to me? Love M. xXx

Hey JB? We all got to get together later on some press crap… you want a ride or are you still with Matt? Wild night last night… If you don’t have a Hangover I’ll be fucking amazed… Give us a Ring in the next hour to tell me or I’ll leave without you… See you Later, Charlie!

James? I know you’re online you gimp just answer me for fucks sake! You’ll have to see me at this meeting anyway. Would you just talk to me for god’s sake! It’s not that big a deal… you knew it was going to happen and it’s not like we’ve not… you know… kissed before you idiot remember those stupid games we’d get roped into back home? Ok so this was a little bit worse but… Come on you can’t say it was any different – unless it is? Talk to me you ass! Sorry just please? Love M. xXx

“For fucks sake!” screamed Matt throwing his glass against the wall and shouting at the computer before breaking down and staring at the screen. He’d gotten no sleep the night before and after being kicked out of James’ house after and unfortunate incident which involved both of them kissing and groping and both of the men enjoying it a little bit more than they should have he was practically having a nervous breakdown.

“Matthew Willis! You better have some explaining to do!” came a scream from down the corridor as his flatmate Mika struggled out of bed to find some meaning to being woken up on her only day off since forever. What she found was broken shards of glass on the carpet, a computer bleeping away and her dark-haired flatmate curled in a corner laughing and crying at the same time.

“Honey?” she muttered making her way over to him and dodging the pieces of glass with ease. “What’s happened?” she asked pulling him up and over to the sofa where they were safe from shards of glass. Rubbing his back she felt his body convulse and him break into a new wave of tears.

“I t-t-told James… well no I k-k-kissed…” the words came out of his mouth heavy with emotion and he couldn’t finish his sentence.

“You kissed him?” she asked, this was something definitely worth waking up for in the morning. “I guess he wasn’t impressed then?” Getting and nod and a shake into her shoulder she asked, “Well which one Matt? Impressed or unimpressed?”

“He kissed me and it was all going fine and then he said that he’d wanted it for so long and then he kind of kicked me out.”

“Matt? That doesn’t make sense love…”

“I Don’t UNDERSTAND, Mika… it’s all so confusing. I think I love him…”

Instant Message Sent: 08:15
Thanks Charlie, I think I’ll take you up on that offer. Matt isn’t here, he went home. You going to get him too? If you do I call front seat! Hehehe, sorry. Erm… see you soon? Later. J.

Instant Message Received: 08.20
Yeah I’m picking up Matt, just spoke to him on the phone – he sounded real depressed… what’s going on? I thought he was staying with you last night? Did you have a fight? You know we’re not allowed fights! That’s why you want the front seat he said that too… you want to stay away from each other! What the fuck is going on J? I’ll be there at 9.30am be outside or tough shit I’ll leave without you! And I want to know everything!

“Shit, Fuck, Crap.” Muttered the messy haired blond at his computer screen. It was too early and his head hurt too much to deal with everything that had happened in the last 24 hours. Now he actually had to face Matt and spend time with him… possibly alone and he really didn’t want that. It’s easy to ignore the problem when it isn’t directly in front of you… thing is he didn’t really think this was the big problem he’d made it out to be in the early hours of the morning. That morning he’d gotten so wrapped up in the feeling of touching, being touched by and kissing Matt he’d forgotten that it was Matt he was kissing. It felt so right…

“But it’s wrong. All wrong!” he shouted throwing the chair backwards and stalking off to his bedroom. He stopped by the door and stared at his bed, the bed he had kicked Matt out of when he had fallen back onto it and reality had hit him. A small smile crossed his face before he shook his head and continued his trip to the bathroom running himself a hot shower, anything to get the image of Matt kissing him and Matt stroking his back and neck and the feel of his body fitting so perfectly with Matt’s, “No.” he stopped himself, feeling himself getting turned on again by the thought he stepped directly into the shower and tried to shake the image. By the time Charlie had arrived at the door he had gotten changed 5 times and tidied up the bathroom and put all the rubbish from his and Matt’s drinking although not being able to bring himself to go into his bedroom in case he had a nervous breakdown. Walking outside he realised Charlie must have picked Matt up first and Matt looked worse than depressed – he looked lie death warmed up. As James stepped into the back of the car, Matt had got there first so got front seat by default, he met Matt’s eyes and expected to see hatred for what he did. Instead he got drawn in and was met by confusion, fear, sadness and something unrecognisable that he would later realise was love.
“Hey.” Matt whispered his voice cracking and he turned his head so violently so James couldn’t see the tears threatening to fall, occupying himself staring out the window and not talking for the rest of the journey.

Hey JB! You all right mate? You looked so out of it in that meeting, you didn’t even drink that much last night – well okay but I swear Matt and I drank more. You couldn’t take your eyes off either the wall or Matt? Why would you be staring at Matt, you hardly spoke to him today and he looked like he’d found out Santa wasn’t real!!! What the hell is going on?! If you don’t tell me I’ll ask Matt and if he won’t tell me, which knowing Matt he won’t I’ll ask Mika… he’ll tell her anything! Answer Me!!! Charlie…

“I wasn’t staring at Matt.” Muttered James clicking the close button on each screen and sitting in complete silence, no sound was buzzing around him and as the night rolled in he stayed stationary. Then fell asleep in his chair only to be woken by the ringing of the phone.

“Wha?” he asked groggily into the phone.

“Jay...” came the voice from the other end.

“Matt?” James replied sitting up in his chair and paying full attention to the speaker.

“Jay? I’m drunk… and I don’t know where I am! And I’m confused… and – and – come get me?” came Matt’s voice from the other end finally breaking and James could hear the sound of tears- Matt never cries, was all he thought ignoring the twist in his stomach.

“Matt calm down! I’m coming to get you… where are you? Wait you’re lost. What can you see that I can find?”

“A big building that says ‘Oak House’ on it.” Muttered Matt sniffing away the tears. “I hurt James.” He added, causing James’ stomach to twist again at the thought of Matt being hurt.

“You were fighting?” he managed to choke out.

“I hurt. Come get me?” and with that he hung up the phone and left James listening to the dial tone before leaping into action and running out of his home.

Why would Matt be here? James was wondering as he pulled up in front of a very large building with ‘Oak House’ imprinted on a plaque by the door and looked out to see Matt sitting on the small wall looking into space with a gash on the side of his head, which was trickling with blood. He looked up at the sound of a car and managed a small grin when he saw James get out and run over to him.

“Oh James. I didn’t know who else to call and I know you hate me but there was no one else and I hurt all over and it’s not good and I didn’t know what to do. And then I thought James will help me no matter what even if it is 2am and I’m sat somewhere strange on my own and no one else is around and you came and-and Thank You.” Matt Babbled until he ran out of things to say and James just stood there listening before raising his hand to touch the gash on his forehead.

“What’ve you gone and done now?” he asked quietly.

“Oh this… just a scratch you should see the other guys.” Laughed Matt before noticing the concern on James’ face and lowering his head. “Nothing.”

“Fine don’t tell me. Just get in the fucking car.” Said James stalking back over to the driver door and slamming it behind him not looking to see if Matt was following him. He didn’t look over when the passenger door opened and shut. Spending the entire journey in silence – a journey that took 20minutes with James breaking the limits back to his house because above all he didn’t think that Matt, with a gash that big and countless other injuries should be alone for the night and although his body was telling him he wanted to spend all the time in the world with Matt his head was saying, No it’s just to make sure he’s ok.

“Go in the kitchen and I’ll get something to clean you up with.” He whispered to Matt as he opened the front door and Matt silently walked into the kitchen as he disappeared to get a towel before following Matt into the kitchen and filling a bowl with warm water. It was the same old routine. Matt would get beaten up or beat someone else up – James would clean him up… but tonight it felt different for both of them. As James spun round he saw Matt sat on the counter and could only think of how beautiful he looked sitting in front of him as he had done so many times before. Shaking his head he made his way over and placed the bowl next to Matt, dipping the towel into the water he motioned for Matt to bend his head so he could reach the cut. Matt didn’t need to be motioned to twice they’d followed this routine so many times but he couldn’t resist moving into James’ hand as he cleaned his cut.

“So…” muttered James trying to ignore the sparks that the contact was causing. “What happened?”

“I don’t want to say.” Matt whispered into the room avoiding James’ eyes and the silence began again as James dried the cut where he’d washed it and nodded to proclaim it Ok.

“Anywhere else?” he asked looking at the visible parts of Matts body before noticing a dark patch on his t-shirt. “Take your shirt off.” He muttered ignoring Matts’ look towards him as he slowly took the shirt off keeping his gaze on James. “Hold still.” Was the muttered reply. To the silent question Matt was going to ask. “And I wouldn’t look.” So what did he do… look down to find blood covering his side.

“Shit! Fuck! Crap! I’m going to die! James I don’t want to die.” Matt shouted at the blonde in front of him.

“You’re not going to die. You just got a little bit beaten up and possibly cut by a few guys, you’re going to be very bruised tomorrow, shit Matt you going to be up for playing?”

“I’ll be fine, just fix me.” He retorted the Matt-ness returning to his voice and the grin returning to his face. It was the same as every other time he got beaten up. Matt would overreact and James would reassure him, although this time he couldn’t deal with his body reacting to James’ touch when James had outright said he had no chance. But he couldn’t help notice James’ hands lingering a little longer on his body and the look in James’ eyes wasn’t one of ‘I’m only helping you as a friend’ it was a look of something he couldn’t place.

James hid a smile at the tone in Matts’ voice. He was trying so hard not to react to the feel of Matts’ body but couldn’t help it. I can’t be gay though. He thought continuing to let his hand stay on Matts’ side although he had finished cleaning the cut on his side.

Knowing that James didn’t want him Matt didn’t want to spend anymore time than he had to around him.

“Are we done?” he asked quickly sliding down off the counter and bringing himself body to body with James who took a sharp intake of breath at the sudden contact. Too close, too close said both minds as their eyes met for the first time that evening. Bringing himself closer towards James, Matt felt his breathing quicken and his heart race. Slowly and softly he brought his mouth to James’ before pulling away. “Just tonight? Please Jay? That’s all I want. Please? Just one night?” he muttered before pulling the smaller blonde towards him and both melted into the kiss.

Instant Message Received: 11.02am
Ok I just spoke to Mika (I can’t even find Matt!!!) she said he didn’t come home last night and she hadn’t seen him since yesterday morning when he told her something had happened between you two and that he was really upset about it. I gather you kicked him out for some reason? What the hell is going on? I’ll see you at 3, ok? Bye…

James woke up to the sound of his phone ringing, and found himself next to a very bruised Matt making him have to think his morning daze away until he realised that the phone was still ringing and that due to certain injuries he and Matt had got kissing and a lot more that night and he had liked it however due to circumstances... like Matt not being able to move well certain things were out of the question. The Phone began to ring again.
“Lo?”
“JJ? It’s Mika, I’ve lost Matt.” Came a hysterical voice from the other end. “I haven’t seen him since yesterday morning when he was really upset because of you. Do you know where he is? Or might be?”
“Breath, Mika. He’s here.” James’ voice sounded croaky.
“He’s with you? What’s happened?”
“He’ll be fine. Just got a bit scraped up is all.”
“Oh god. Silly boy. Tell him I’m going to thump him when he gets home. Bye JJ.” And with that she hung up leaving James with his own thoughts.
Matt woke up all alone, and in pain. Lots of pain, not opening his eyes he knew he was in James’ room because all he could smell was James, he also knew James wasn’t there and had to think back to the night before to remember what had happened. Groaning he slowly sat up and then opened his eyes looking at his torso, which was bruised and had a slight cut along his side. He slid himself out of the bed and picked up his jeans off the floor before padding out of the room and towards the kitchen where he could hear the sounds of something being cooked… or attempted to be cooked.
“Matt? What’s going on?” asked James not turning towards the doorway just knowing he was there.
“Huh?” was the intelligent reply.
“You should be in bed you idiot. You’re all bashed up.”
“No I really think I should be going. Just came to ask for the location of my shirt. I vaguely remember taking it off in here last night.”
“Oh, it’s over there.” Muttered James keeping his head turned and trying to hide the disappointment in his voice, he was just working his feelings out and Matt was leaving. “Matt, what were you fighting over? You haven’t had a fight for years.”
“Don’t worry about it. I’m fine.” Came the muffled reply as Matt pulled on his shirt, wincing at the pain from moving his arms too high.
“You weren’t fine last night. You were bleeding I haven’t had to clean you up since you and Charlie got in that stupid fight last year and you bashed yourself on a table corner.”
“I told you to leave it. I was arguing with some bloke about something stupid like football and we got angry and fought. No Big Deal.”
“You’re lying.”
“I can’t deal with this now James.” And James winced, Matt never called him James not for ages even when they had met he had called him Jay.
“Lying.”
“Fine then. Fine you really want to know? You really want to know why I was beaten up?”
”Yeah I do.” Both knew they were being stupid and childish but they carried on.
“Fine, it was about you. Now if you’ll excuse me, Mika is going to murder me.” And with that he stormed out of James’ home leaving James stood staring out the window.
“Actually she’s going to thump you.” He whispered watching Matt walk onto the pavement from the window. “Shit.”

“Matt? Is that you? I’m going to kill you!” Greeted Matt as he walked through the door and straight into Mika, who was looking and sounding like a very angry tiger. Her anger was soon replaced by concern when she saw his face. “God Matt what happened to you? When James said scraped I thought it meant like a misplaced punch or something not Matt in severe agony.”
“Hey Mika.” Was all he said as he walked past her and into their living room. “I’m fine, really. Don’t worry about me.”
“Hey I’m allowed to worry about you, how did you end up at JJs’ last night? Did anything happen? He didn’t beat on you did he? I’ll kill him.” She jumped up but was quickly pulled back down by Matt who looked at her as if to say. ‘Don’t be stupid!’
“Erm... well basically I got beat up, which was mostly my fault and I didn’t know what to do except ring James. So I did and he came and got me and cleaned me up…”
“And?”
“We almost had sex.” Was the reply from Matt who was turning red.
“Almost?”
“I’m bruised and bleeding – do you really think we could do much?” Muttered Matt turning an even deeper red.
“So?”
“It was just last night. It doesn’t make any difference. He doesn’t want me… who would?”
“Why would you and he almost have sex if he doesn’t want you? That’s crazy.”
“But it’s James… he’s not the most normal person…” came the depressed answer.
“But he doesn’t do stuff he doesn’t want to, does he?” countered Mika. “Anyway what did you fight about in the first place?”
“James.” Watching him for a few minutes Mika tried to figure out what was going on, giving up she settled for just asking.
“But James didn’t beat you up? I don’t get it Matt, explain please?”
“Basically these guys were saying stuff about Busted and I was all fine about that – I mean not everyone can like us right? So I was ignoring them until I heard the words ‘that blonde one’ and I listened. They were talking about him looking like an easy target and that if they could get at Busted he’d be the one…” Staring into space he trailed off, trying to stop his tears. “Mika? What if they did get him? I didn’t want him to get hurt so I went over and told them not to go near James, EVER. Then I left and got jumped.”
“So you were protecting James from people who would probably never meet him?”
“Yes ok. It sounds daft but I don’t want anyone to ever hurt him. They were scary blokes they could have done anything.”
“You’re one of a kind Matthew Willis, one of a kind.” She muttered pulling him into a much needed hug and kissing the top of his head affectionately.

“Jeez, Mat you ok?” James heard Charlie ask when he walked in for the prerecording of some TV show, there really are too many he thought as he heard the remainder of the sentence. “Walk into a bus?”

“A bus? What the hell?” laughed Mat wincing as the movement hurt his bruised torso. “I got in a fight thick wit.” He added glancing over at James who was sat in the corner, guitar on his knee, ignoring Mat although he was completely aware of his presence. James really didn’t know what to do. Mat had been in trouble last night but after that kiss everything was different and at this precise moment in time all he wanted to do was jump on Mat and kiss him for all he was worth. He was after all recovering from a fight. A fight about me though? Why? He had been asking himself this since Mat had told him and still had no clue what Mat would have had to fight about with him. Coming out of his daze he noticed he was staring at the spot where Mat had been stood and although Mat had moved Charlie was looking at him in a very strange way.

“What?”

“Oh nothing, just thinking. Come on we’ve gotta show to do – Mat went before and you were in a trance.”

“Right – off we go then.” Muttered James picking up the guitar and heading out the door.

“Left.” Said Charlie coming to a halt behind a stopped James.

“I know, I know. Sorry I’m not with it.” Muttered James turning left and heading down the corridor to where he could hear Mat tuning his bass. Walking through the doors Mat looked up and met his eyes. Giving him a small smile James felt his stomach twist, Odd, I can’t be falling for him. Looking up again he concentrated on Mat moving about the stage occasionally looking up at James before laughing and motioning for him to get his butt on stage. Oh god, I’m in love with Mat… now what do I do?

James couldn’t keep his eyes off Mat during the performance. He knew it and Mat knew it, through the whole thing he had felt the blue eyes on his back and despite smiling to himself he had repeated the same mantra. Just one night, it was only one night. He doesn’t want me… His concentration was broken when the presenter said, “That was great guys.” And started with the mini interview. Don’t ask please don’t ask don’t ask about the face or cut, was being repeated through both Mat and James’ head with Charlie sat there not really paying attention to the tension between the two friends since the fight. “So just out of interest, how did you turn out so… bruised Mat?”

Stumbling over his words he began about 15 different sentences until Charlie laughed.

“He walked into a bus.” And James dissolved into laughter next to him, even Mat had to laugh at the absurdity of the comment.

“A bus?” asked the interviewer in shock.

“Actually no,” muttered James wiping his eyes. “He won’t tell anybody what happened, well not really. I think he’s chicken.” He said staring at Mat without blinking.

“Well Thanks Guys. I think that’s all, yep? Great. See you around.” And with that the interviewer walked off to do her next job.

“Right well guys I got to run.” Said Charlie picking up his stuff and running out of the studio and leaving the 2 men in silence.

“Want a lift Jay?” Matt muttered into the silence after a while.

“Yeah, and a stiff drink.” James laughed squirming inwardly at Mats’ nickname for him. It had never affected him before but now… it made him feel special.

“My house?”

“Sure.” James choked out following Mat out of the room as he was throwing his keys up and down whilst catching them to the best of his ability.

4 hours and many discarded cans of beer later Mat and James were sat cross legged in Mats’ living room laughing at something stupid that had happened years ago in South End, something that was hilarious when they had thought of it but now couldn’t remember what it was. Mat was leaning forward as he laughed and James was watching him and before he knew what was going on he leaned forward and kissed Mat who stiffened in response before pulling away and jumping up swearing under his breath. Suddenly both were very sober and Mat watched as James stood up slowly to match the height and again leant forward and met Mats’ lips. Again Mat pulled away.

“Jay, I can’t get hurt again. It was one night that was all. I was happy… not ecstatic but content with that. Don’t make me think I can have more now. I’m not getting involved unless this is real Jay. Sorry.” Mat turned on his heal and stalked off towards his bedroom glad Mika wasn’t in because she would have castrated James for hurting Mat and killed Mat for not taking this chance.

“That’s great Mat. Walk away from this but some stupid little fight that meant nothing you had to go and get yourself knifed or whatever.” Screamed James at his retreating back causing Mat to stop and turn around.

“You don’t know the half of it.” He said in a deadly whisper to the blond who was walking towards him.

“Maybe because you’re too proud to tell me. What was it about Mat? Ok me? Why? Because you were annoyed and needed something to take it out on and then blame me? Because you got drunk and found someone who you thought would be easy and thought of me when they were taking you home? What was Mat? Come on tell me! I’m all ears.” James said in a cold voice, “Don’t mess me around this time Mat. Don’t. Even. Dare.”

Mat moved closer and James’ body shuddered in response.

“I’m not telling you James. Leave it.” Whispered Mat into James’ ear before turning to walk. But before he could get anywhere he was spun round and pinned against the wall. Wincing at the pain that shot through him from one of his bruises.
”You better tell me. I want to know. If you don’t tell me then this.” He grasped Mat in a savage kiss exploring every part of his mouth. They had kissed before but this had set off fireworks. “This… will never ever begin. Ever.”

“Ever?” whispered Mat looking down as James released his shirt.

“Ever. Start talking Mat. I can make the choice to walk away, can you?”

“Fine! You want to know? You’re so desperate to know why I look and feel like shit at this precise moment in time?” muttered Matt quietly but the anger still evident in his voice. James nodded slowly not liking the way this was turning out.

“Yeah… I do.” He whispered standing very close to Matt but not touching, still both were aware of each other and both were very annoyed with the other.

“Well I’ll tell you then. It was all because of you James. No one had a problem with me; they jumped me because I was protecting you. I was protecting a guy who wouldn’t talk to me for a whole day because of one stupid kiss – when we were drunk! And still you came and looked after me when I was scared, but it was all because of you. How does that make you feel Jay? Are you sure you wanted to know now?” Matt whispered calmly, noticing that somewhere during his rant James’ hand had made it’s way to his side and was rubbing soothing circles up and down. He wasn’t looking at James, he was watching the hand but his head shot up when he heard a sniff and saw silent tears tracking their way down his face.

“Matt?” came James’ voice choked out by the sobs that were starting to go through his body now he was actually looking at him. “I’m so sorry.” He whispered. “I’ve got to go.” He said more to himself than Matt who had no idea how to handle a situation but only knowing that he didn’t want James to leave, not now. Instead he did the first thing that came into his mind to stop James leaving grabbing his arm, that was still on his side only had stopped its path up and down he pulled James into a hug rubbing his back and letting him cry into his shirt.

“Jay? I never meant to make you cry. Please don’t it’s not your fault I swear to you.”

“Yes it is.” Was muffled by his shirt.

“No, it wasn’t. Did you make me go over to those people and stick up for you? Especially when there is no way they could ever get near you anyway – No. Did you make those guys follow me out of the pub and jump me? No. It was all me, caring too much about a friend and might I add we weren’t even talking to each other when I did it so it was kind of a blessing. We wouldn’t be here now would we if it hadn’t have happened. Would we?” Matt whispering into James’ ear and the rubbing on his back was having an extremely calming effect and his sobs were turning into small sniffles as he wiped his eyes on the drier material and looked up at Matt.

“Thanks Matt.”

“Did you just wipe your nose on my shirt?” he asked looking at the shoulder of his shirt carefully and making James laugh, however weekly.

“I think we need to talk about some things.” James added through his giggles.

“Yeah so do I.”

“Food first?”

“You read my mind. Pizza?”

“Yeah.” Laughed James. This is how it’s meant to be – Matt and me, no one else. We’ve been through a lot this is right, right? Looking at the dark haired boy who was on the phone ordering Pizza was enough to shut his mind up. Of course it’s right. We just need to talk about it first. No more arguments.

No more arguments? Asked James in his head as he was being wrestled to the floor. I guess it’s not a real argument if we were fighting over the last piece of pizza… that has now been SQUASHED. With that thought he knocked Matt over and onto his back and end up lying on top of him. The fight had stopped and all he could think about was how close he was to Matt and how easy it would be to kiss him there and then. Fuck it. He leant in and lightly brushed his lips against Matts’, being pulled closer by the older boy as he deepened the kiss. Matt rolled James over and attacked his mouth again bringing out a small moan from both of them when James brought him closer than they both imagined and their bodies came as close as possible. So close that when Mika walked into the door of the flat she couldn’t tell where one started and the other began. Picking up the last piece of pizza, that hadn’t been squashed or knocked on the floor but was actually still on the side table she picked up a cushion and threw it at the two men. Both looked up and laughed when they saw her standing over them eating the last piece of pizza.

“You ate the pizza.” Laughed James looking rather mussed up as his shirt had been discarded somewhere during the kissing, although neither could remember when. Matt raised an eyebrow and laughed.

“You’re giving me nightmares.” Retorted Mika acting like a little child. “Imagine if I had walked in and you had gotten a bit further than what I saw. Scarred for life!”

“Imagine that.” Muttered Matt. “I don’t think you’re in any position. You told me how you grew up. I don’t think me and Jay are going to harm you in anyway.”

“Ok then I had a pretty ‘bohemian’ upbringing and yeah I might have seen many people going at it in random living rooms. But in my own? There’s just some things a girl doesn’t want to know.” Smiling sweetly she finished. “I’ll leave you guys to it.” Before rushing out of the room and getting a cushion thrown after her.

“Random.” Muttered James noticing Matt was still resting on him and had begun to draw patterns on his stomach sending shivers through his body and down into certain regions that he was sure Matt could feel from his position on top of James. His thoughts however were cut off when Matt kissed him very gently under his ear.

“Where were we?” he whispered and James shivered again as Matt kissed his neck and made his way back to his mouth. Letting himself be kissed for a second James then pulled back as well as he could from his position on the floor, which resulted in him banging his head, hard.

“Ouch.” Then he started laughing at the situation. 3 days ago this kind of thing would never have happened and he definitely wouldn’t have thought about kissing Matt on the living room floor. “I think we need to have this talk first.” He said pushing himself up to Matt who was sat back on his knees still holding James to the floor.

“Your right. As always.” Was the reply followed by a brief kiss as James allowed himself to be pulled up off the floor and back onto the sofa where both ended up leaning against the opposite arms with their knees touching in the middle. “Who goes first?” he asked when the silence went on for too long.

“You’re an idiot Matt.”

“Well I’m glad we got that out of the way, here I was thinking I was relatively normal. Just for that… it’s your turn.”

“Fine.”

“Fine.”

“Fine. I’ll go. What do I say?”

“This was your idea Jay. You think of whatever you have to say.” Replied Matt laughing at how downhill the conversation was going, and so quickly as well.

“Ok then. When you kissed me a few nights back it was so weird. Yeah ok so when you lived with us in South End we’d kissed on dares and stuff but then I felt something and it freaked me so much. What do you do when you’re freaked? Run. So I ignored the problem. Which meant I ignored you but then you got beaten up and I kept telling myself it was wrong and not right. I’ve never liked a guy before like I like you and then you were hurt and it hurt.” James was rambling on and on. He knew it and Matt knew it but he had to get it out and Matt realised this as well so let the insanity continue. “All I wanted to do was be there for you Matt that’s all and then you left in the morning and I was alone with my thoughts and I thought that it wasn’t fair you could leave me then. Just when I was thinking things through and then I realised that I-“

“I love you.”

“Meh?” was the only sound James could make. “I’m sorry what?”

“I love you.” Matt replied looking anywhere but James and finding the ripped up carpet very interesting.

“Why?”

“What? You idiot. Why do you think? Maybe because you’re always there for me and that you look after me even if we’ve had a fight and that I loved you just normally. Then one day I looked at you and thought, when did my best friend get so beautiful? And that was it I was gone.”

“But… you love me.” Whispered James crawling towards him and moving Matts’ chin so he could look into his eyes. “Me?”

“For fucks sake Jay. I.” Matt pointed at himself locking eyes with James. “Love.” He pointed at his heart. “You.” And he pointed at James. “Got it?”

“Got it.” He replied kissing Matt fully on the lips. “Thank you.” He whispered pulling away and sitting back in his position on the sofa.

“Thank You?”

“Yeah. Because if you hadn’t of told me that I would never be so sure about this.” He whispered.

“You’ve lost me now Jay. Sure about what?”

“Loving you back.”

Mika wasn’t surprised after what she had witnessed the night before (and what she had witnessed walking to her bathroom at 4am) to find James and Matt curled up around each other on the sofa. Both asleep and both smiling happily. Watching the two was making her smile. Oh the love. She thought to herself then giggled. Even my mind is sarcastic. Lost in her own thoughts about the situation she wandered into the kitchen and was still thinking when the phone rang.

“Yeah?” she said picking it up on the first ring.

“What an elegant way to answer the phone Mi.”

“Hey you. What do you want Charles?” she asked laughing again.

“Any sign of Matt this morning? And I’ve misplaced James.”

“Take a chill pill. They’re here all curled up and happy.”

“Curled up and happy? Something I should know about?”

“Well… if you had cared to bet on it, you would have to know about the £20 you owe me. But since you were chicken… nope nothing.”

“Seriously they finally sorted themselves out?”

“Yep but I’m still £20 down because I would have won.” She retorted then spun round hearing Matt clearing his throat in the doorway with an amused expression on his face. “Got to go, Bye.” She muttered then hung up.

“Care to explain?” asked Matt pouring himself a cup of coffee and sitting opposite her.

“Depends how much you heard.”

“’Chill Pill’?” he answered smirking at the blush covering her face. Busted. They both thought then laughed at their own thoughts before laughing at each other.

“Well basically, we put a bet on you and JJ getting together. I won I said it would take 2 months or less from when we spoke about it, Charlie said 5, but then he wouldn’t bet on it.”

“And we’re only worth £20? I’m outraged.”

“£20 is a lot to a poor girl living off her wonderfully good friends who happen to be pop stars. If he’d won I would have had to nick it off you anyway. Where’s JJ by the way?” she asked quickly changing the subject.

“JJ…” he laughed again. “Is still asleep.”

“No, am not.” Came the sleep distorted voice.

“You quite sure?” asked Mika with a large smile.

“No…”

“Aww, my poor JJ…”

“He’s mine now.” Said Matt grinning.

“… Needs a hug.” She finished getting up as James started to run away.

“You aren’t hugging me Mika. Nope no way. Ouch!” he landed on the sofa with Mika wrapped round his middle and Matt standing over them laughing.

“I’m so happy.” She laughed giving him a sloppy kiss on the cheek and turning round to give one to Matt. “For both of you. But now I got to go. Be good.” She laughed again bounding off to get her bag as she left the room.

“Bye.” Muttered Matt laughing at James’ horrified face.

“How do you live with her?” he asked.

“I don’t know. She kind of reminds me of a certain someone with sugar being pumped through their veins. Remind you of anyone?” he asked having inched closer to James and now taking up the space Mika had vacated.

“No. Who would that be?” he asked in mock innocence.

“I wonder.” Matt muttered closing the distance between them. “I think we’re the last to realise everything Jay.”

“Hmm?”

“I mean even Charlie noticed us before we did and he kind of doesn’t pay much attention.”

James blatantly wasn’t listening and was more interested in drawing patterns on Matts’ stomach. “That’s nice Matt.”

“You’re not listening.” He accused.

“No I’m really not.” He answered closing in for a kiss. “Does it matter?”